July 23, 2009 by  Ashley Guberman

In the movies City of Angels, and Wings of Desire, people going about their lives were often caught up in negative self-talk. The angles, who would hear all this but could not be seen by people, would occasionally come close to a person engaged with their frustrations, anxieties, or fears and the angel would touch that person. Usually, it was a simple gesture, like a hand on the shoulder, but that simple touch was actually touching the lives of those who were negatively engaged.

I have two angles of my own at home now – two infants, still less than a month old. Periodically, they will be in deep sleep, only to startle, fidget, or fuss, beginning with small whimpers, then reaching a crescendo of full blown wailing. But if I notice their fussing early on, before it reaches such an energetic apex, I can put my hand on their head or chest, or bring my cheek to theirs and they usually calm down and return to blissful sleep.

It works the other way around, too. When I find myself engaged with life’s frustrations, I can hold them close to me and everything melts away into love and compassion – for both of them, and for myself.

So what’s actually happening in these moments – the angle’s touch, my hand on the babies’ chest, or their soothing power over me? I suspect that in all cases it is all about open, genuine contact, offered lovingly, without judgment, expectation, or attachment to outcome.
As adults, we experience these moments with each other too, though they are often so few and far between, so rare and utterly unexpected, that we forget that each and every one of us has the power to touch another human being in that way. All of us have within us the capacity to be touched and soothed by that genuine contact, offered by another without judgment, expectation, or attachment to outcome.

Thus, by once again remembering that power and capacity within me, I see the model for who I want to be.

That’s also part of my draw to coaching, and a picture of how I relate to clients – open, making genuine contact, offered lovingly and without judgment, expectation, or attachment. My intention with my clients is that through my “Being,” by coming from that place and making authentic, heartfelt contact, that you reconnect with the angles within you to see more clearly the way to achieve your own Primary Goals in life.

{"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}


Primary Goals sits at the intersection of three core ideas about communication:
  • Leaders create vision by communicating a compelling future to their teams.
  • Teams create success based on how effectively the communicate and coordinate with each other.
  • Entrepreneurial ventures are successful only when they communicate value to people with a concern that the business can take care of
In all cases, it’s about Conversations for Committed Results.  That’s our Primary Goal.  



Copyright 2021 Primary Goals - Privacy Policy