When I was younger, we had a riding-lawnmower. It had a clutch and brake on one side, and the throttle on the other. At the time, I had no idea what any of those pedals really did. I was too young to use the thing, but I wanted to go for a ride so I convinced myself that the yard needed mowing. I told myself I was going to do a good deed. Or so I thought.
The yard was mostly flat and I managed to get the thing started by turning the key, but I wasn’t going anywhere. I saw the gear-lever in the middle, and I knew how to count. So I tried putting it into 1st gear, but had to really struggle since I had no idea what a clutch was. Eventually, I got it in gear, then it started to move slowly all on its own. I was able to steer the thing around the yard and I was having an absolute BLAST!
Since I was on a slight incline, I quickly learned that the pedal on the right (gas) made me go faster, and that either pedal on the left (brake or clutch) made me stop. Good enough, I thought. Soon, I got to the back of the yard, turned around, and started going downhill. At that point, I started going a bit faster and was rapidly loosing the illusion of control I had created earlier.
I kept stepping on the clutch as far as it would go, but this time I failed to stop until reaching the bottom of the hill, at which point I ran into mom’s apple tree, which also brought me to a stop.
So what on earth does that have to do with coaching? That depends…
- Have you ever wanted to do or create something in your life, but been afraid that it might not turn out right?
- Have you ever found it difficult to get yourself into gear to get started?
- Have you ever let “not knowing how” prevent you from taking the first steps?
When we reach a point in our lives where we want (or need) to make a change in order to make progress on our goals, we need to find the clutch that will let us change gears. By analogy, the clutch would be the act of making a declaration. Never mind the “how” just yet. Making a declaration opens up the possibility of anything happening. It is only from within this possibility that we can put ourselves into a new gear.
The various gears would be an indication of our conviction, commitment, or the promises we make to ourselves and to others — especially to others — because they serve as structures to keep us on track.
The throttle represents the concrete actions we take to get moving. Without action, we will forever find ourselves stuck in idle, if not completely stalled. Commitment plus action is like stepping on the gas with the engine in gear.
More than anything else in this analogy, fear represents the brakes. Nothing will stop our good intentions and derail positive actions more than a focus on fear. It’s not actually the fear that stops us; rather, it’s the attention that we give it. It is not a about trying to avoid the apple tree. Instead, it’s about the attaining our primary goals. To do that, keep your hand on the wheel by focusing your attention (what you notice) on your intentions (what you want).
So when you’re ready to put your life in gear toward the attainment of your Primary Goals, contact me. I’ve even got a referral if you want somebody to mow your lawn.